Dear Eeza,
Don’t worry about him. He’s a jerk. He’s an ass, and he’s not even cute. I’m proud of you for telling him off. And it’s ok to feel hurt or insulted. Anyone in your position would feel that way. If that happened to me, I would have slapped him in the face and run him over with my car. It’s a good thing I don’t drive.
Anyway, I’m really proud of you.
I know I told you that I’d be returning to Canada tentatively on November. Well, change of plans, I’m leaving 1st week of August. I know it’s sad that I’m leaving, but honestly, I’m really excited. As to Joel, I told him about it and he agreed. He’s seen how miserable I am here so I guess he understands. He said that if I’m leaving on November anyway, then August won’t really make a big difference. I know he’s sad, but things are better for him now. He can handle me leaving this time. And it’s not like we’re breaking up. I mean, we will try the long distance thing. I believe we have what it takes to make it work. No offense. 
Anyway, work has been… umm… tiring. I swear, litigation is not for me. I hate appearing in court. I used to love it when I was just an intern, observing the proceedings in court. But now that I’m the one actually appearing before the judge, it’s just plain stressful. Having realized that, I’ve been itching to tender my resignation. But of course, I’ll be leaving in a couple of months anyway, so I’ll just bear with it for now. Plus, I have no hearings scheduled anyway.
Mom told me that their lawyer suggested that I take law school again in Canada instead of the 11 qualifying tests to make me a Canadian lawyer. He said that It’ll only take 3 years and I’m still young… Anyway, I don’t think that would be such a bad idea. School would enable me to make new friends. Plus, our law school experience was really great so I have no qualms of going thru that again. However, it might be more expensive. Plus, going to law school does not mean dispensing with the tests. I mean, there would be midterms and finals for ALL the subjects.
By the way, I think I’m having a quarter-life crisis. I’m having these compulsions to re-evaluate my dreams. What makes me excited? What am I passionate about? Definitely, it’s not legal practice. At one point I even wanted to become a lifestyle journalist. After watching Angels and Demons, I wanted to be a historian. And being here in the office, makes me want to be just a secretary (puting labels on folders, filing…) Maybe I’m just burnt out in this job. And honestly, I even look forward to my old job selling shoes, as it requires no intellectual exercise whatsoever. Plus, my actions bear little consequence to others. As oppose to my job now, the liberty of a person, the completion of government projects and the continued performance of government functions lie in my hands. That much responsibility just tire me out. I can’t imagine what it feels like to be Spiderman.
Oh well, can’t wait to see you girls this weekend. And by the way, when are we going to the beach? I think it would be fab if I arrive in Canada with a nice tanline.
Lovelots,
Ana
Posted by ana 
